The Eccentric Act of Ear Wax Removal

I often brag to people about how I am so amazingly dedicated to my craft of DJ'ing and Recording that I have my ears cleaned out once a year. It's true, although it usually ends up being as much as a year and a half between cleanings. Excessive ear wax build up dramatically affects hearing. Ear wax creates a filter that buffers some frequencies and heightens others. I can tell it's time for a cleaning when my ears fatigue early during a recording session. Drum cymbals and guitars sound irritating. Have you ever wondered why "old people" who have hearing loss always think that music sounds too loud? It seems a contradiction, right? When people develop hearing loss it is usually certain frequencies that are lost, which causes other frequencies to be accented, such as the aggressive and annoying 4 to 5 kilohertz range. About five years ago I decided to be fitted for a pair of musician ear plugs. These are custom ear plugs that are molded and fitted to the shape of your ear. They have a linear sound reduction of 15 db. Everything sounds clear and even. They were originally designed by some guy who played in an orchestra who was constantly being annoyed by the trumpet player. He tried conventional ear plugs but it affected the tonality of his instrument. Anyway, the place that sells these ear plugs is a called Hearing Health Center. They are in an old building on Michigan Avenue with a real Dick Tracy vibe to it. Very art deco. Their primary business seems to be hearing aids. There's always some old guy in the waiting room complaining really loud about how much his hearing aid batteries cost. They have photos on the waiting room wall of all the celebrities they have served over the years, most notably Lou Ferrigno (The Incredible Hulk), Arnold Palmer and Leslie Nielsen. I always feel strangely out of place there. Anyway, when I was originally fitted for the ear plugs I first had to have my ears cleaned out. I was BLOWN AWAY by how much wax had built up in my ears. My ears had been plugged up and I didn't even know it. I could hear so much better afterwards. In fact, for about a week I felt like I had ultra sensitive hearing. I could hear things like my clothes rustling and my hands on the steering wheel. I decided to start scheduling yearly visits to have my ears cleaned out. I also have my hearing checked, which is fun. I feel like I'm in a Wes Anderson film. All of the test equipment and headphones look like they date from the sixties. I have a subtle loss of hearing between 4 to 5 kilohertz, but am within the range of good hearing.